honestly?

*Honestly, where u at? At work; on my lunch break.

* Honestly, what's on your mind? I’m so tired!

* Honestly, who are you chatting online with?: Aizura

* Honestly, what is it that you REALLY should be doing right now? Nothing much; just need to design a banner

* Honestly, have you brushed your teeth today? YES!

* Honestly, are you a good friend? I try to be

* Honestly, do you really think going to school is all that important? Yes but you learn more once you’re out of it.

* Honestly, what are your dreams about mostly? Being happy. With him & family.

* Are you HONESTLY single? No, I’m signed, almost sealed..and will be delivered

* Honestly, what are you so happy about right now? That I’m getting engaged soon and my probation period at work is ending!

* Honestly, what are you so sad about right now? Thinking of the past

* Honestly, how old are you now? 24 y/o soon

* Honestly, who are you missing? My sayang and my little ones at home *niece/nephews*

* Honestly, have you ever stole something? Don’t think so

* Honestly, what song are you listening to right now? Some English song

* Honestly, who do you want to meet at this very moment? My sayang

* Honestly, where do you like to be kissed? My sayang knows.

* Honestly, do you hate someone right now? Some girl. Sayang knows who.

* Honestly, who do you wanna hug right now? My sayang and the little ones

* Honestly, are you bored? Kind of

* Honestly, who do you wanna slap right now? That same girl.

TODAY
How stupid and immature can that girl be? I seriously don’t care what you say and do with your life. For me, you are just one HUGE MISTAKE that happened in his life. Get over it, girl! Why hang on to something that is just upsetting you! You make it sound like you have everything intact now like a new guy or whatever; but clearly by the way you write to me, you are just trying to get revenge.

Please, only a few people can hurt me. And you are definitely not one of them. So, save your energy that you use to type stupid messages to me; put it to better use. Insulting how I look doesn’t help while you looked like a haggard old lady. Enough said.

YESTERDAY
K had lunch at my house. I cooked two dishes; just for him. Then we headed to Shah Alam; with his brand new car. Yippee, my sayang can now drive me around. Met up with the nice lady who will be doing our hantarans. The price that she’s charging is quite reasonable. So, leaving everything up to her creativity.

I’m at work; trying my best to stay awake. No more late nights for me. I just can’t stop reading the book.

While trying to keep myself awake, I just blog-hop. Going from one’s blog to another to another……Well, you get my point. It’s good to know that most of the problems they’re going through in life are similar to mine. It makes me feel better because I know that I’m not the only one going through some issues in life. Things are getting better; with the family, him and work.

I’m still having my guard up; in case I get hurt again. The trust is there; little by little it’s being re-enforced. I can see that everyone especially him is trying to make an effort to make it better; so I’m making an effort as well.

How old are you?
I’m 24 this year

Does love mean never having to say you're sorry?
No, people make mistakes.

Is it better to have loved and lost. Than never to have loved at all?
Yes. We need someone eventually

Have you ever fallen in love at first sight?
Attraction; the spark. I usually make judgements on people when I first meet them. It changes after I get to know them better.

Can you tell the difference between infatuation and love?
Depends, I usually know when I have someone special.

Does physical appearance matter when you're in love?
No, but I guess everyone would pick the one who looks the best out of the crowd.

Do you believe opposites attract?
Yes.

Do you have to "work" to stay in love?
Yes, it takes both sides to make it work

If you're in love is it possible to still be attracted to someone else?
In my case, NO. A cute guy is a guy cute..nothing else. Only one guy for me.

Are you currently in love?
Yes

How do you know that you are in love with someone?
When I can stand his “everything”..even though I bitched about it..I’ll still stand by him

Is it possible to "cheat" and still be in love with the person you cheated on?
This question is similar to what I’ve been though. No, I wasn’t the one who cheated.

If your boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife ever cheated on you, would you leave him/her?
I thought I would but I looked pass that BIG MISTAKE and trying to move on.

Explain your reason for the above answer
We all have our moments of doing stupid. It depends how long one is being stupid though.

Barely had a good night’s rest.

Yesterday was a public holiday. yippee.
While K was busy doing his own thing, I was busy shopping with the family at the Curve. Got my kebaya top from Uluwatu. Thanks mum/dad! Headed to Biwani’s where I got the kain for my sarung and my tudung.

The tudung is to be worn on the engagement day. No, I have yet to change myself. Not ready yet. Hopefully K approves of the stuff I got for myself. He is fussier than me. I have so many things to buy….luckily the folks are sponsoring most of it. Most of the items are for my hantaran (gifts) to him.

Thinking of getting a shirt.

My weekend was interesting. Spent the Saturday with my K and Sunday was “Sha-is-a-housewife” day.

Saturday
Woke up very early in the morning. Couldn’t sleep well due to the shoulder pain. Yes, I know I should get the shoulder checked but I hate doctors! Had my typical morning beverage of Nescafe. Had a “talk” with the parents.

Left home around 10.30am, headed to Jaya Jusco to get donuts for sayang’s family. Headed to Serendah. I was quite excited to see him and the folks because;

1) I miss him so much
2) I wanted to see my kain hantaran *his gifts to me on the engagement day* which was purchased by his mum/grandma at Sarawak
3) I just wanted to see my sayang

Had lunch at his place. Then off to Cineleisure for a movie. Also to find a top for this kain (sarung / sarong) that his mum bought for me. We decided to use that sarong for me to wear on the engagement day. So, we scoped out Uluwatu. Found a really nice kebaya to match it with.

K and I spent our day gawking at Nike shoes. Hehe, since being with me…he developed a very strong liking to the colour brown. Which I got from Evonne back then. Overall, I had a fantastic day with him.

Sunday
Spent the day vacumning, ironing, washing, dusting, folding and you-name-it,i-did-it! See dear, I’m trying to be a good future wife.

Monday (Today)
Ankle/Leg hurts. Period is here. I feel like throwing up *thank god for period; confirmed I won't develop any bumps in a period of 9 months*

I don’t plan to blog much really.

Just to let my friends know that I’m fine. I’m just stressed over certain matters at home and personal issues. This whole week (month, really) has been one crazy roller coaster ride for me. I hope by end of this month, everything will be fine as usual.

There are just moments when I just need to cry. And there are moments when I just need time to cool down. Thank you for your concern..you know who you are. A true friend of mine.

To my special person, I wish we could be like before. When we first met. I know the stress of everything is getting to us - especially me. But as you know; I'm one degil (stubborn) girl so nothing/NO ONE can get in the way alright, sayang!

Its true what they say; the closer the date gets..the more f@ck-up things get. Its probably just God’s way to test how strong both of parties are. I seriously hate how things are turning out.

What supposed to be a stress-free day turned out to be one of those “I rather sulk at home” day. I knew something was wrong. I can hear it from your voice and the way you act whenever I asked. No matter how much you hide, somehow someone will know…in this case, it was me. How stupid can I be right? Or were you angry because I found out. It’s not over until that person/her friends/her whatever is out from your life.

*sigh*

I have no respect for that person.

I’m feeling so sick today. I was actually trembling *I even switched off the air-conditioning in the car* on my way to work today. I managed to arrive safely to work. It’s probably because I’m tired due to working over the weekend. I need some rest badly!

K came over for dinner yesterday. He stayed longer than usual. Surfed the net at my house because his current job doesn’t allow him to browse websites. It was nice to have him around at the house; and it’s been awhile I felt close to him. Especially lately due to some insecurities. The funny thing was I found out he started smoking again yesterday because I smelt ciggies on his hands. No point in denying ok! He can no longer proudly say that he has quit smoking. Yesterday was definitely “I’m-feeling-good-day”

Today is one of the days when I feel kind of down. Probably coz I’m sick and worried about some stuff. Well, it’s probably just another day……………

I have lots of photos to upload but the computer at work doesn’t allow any outside connection by unknown devices. Can’t even install any software *sigh*

Another day at the office. Nothing much really except I need to be in KLCC around 2pm. Need to set up the booth for tomorrow’s education fair. Yes, it’s that time of the year when colleges, schools and universities are rushing to get students into their respective establishment.

Yesterday’s updates – nothing except we fought, met with K, went for lunch and oh yeah, wasted almost more than an hour listening to this guy talked about his business. Interesting huh? I was pretty much sulking for the whole entire day. Went home to an empty house; watched TV, played the game and ate caramel pudding.

Dinner with friends at Hartamas. Most of them were there with their significant other. So, I managed to secure a seat (or rather a friend who was alone due to his girl going MIA) at the singles table. Slept around 2am. Hence, me now very sleepy.

I’m having such a bad day at work today and it’s not because of work! I’m having stomach cramps; my period is only next week *I think*

My back is also killing me; feel like crying due to the pain.

[Today’s actual entry]
The above was supposed to be yesterday’s entry. Yesterday, after work..met up with K. In separate cars, both of us drove to my home. Had him over for dinner. It’s been awhile since he’s been at my place. I kind of took serious offence when I found out about him spending more time with that _________’s family rather than mine. It should be *by now* a closed issue but sometimes, it’ll just pop in my mind. Certain issues will just stick in my head and never go away.

Enough of that nonsense. Work today is hectic. Currently on a break. No calls, no emails and no one to bug me. The only thing I need right now is caffeine. I have a sudden craving for it. Damn you, PMS! Craving also for Dominos...yumyum

Oh yeah, tomorrow is a holiday. Yippee….alas, dad has commissioned me to help him rearrange the furniture around the house. Apparently the rearranging of furniture is due to my awaiting engagement day. EKKKKKKKKKKK…can’t wait!

*does her silly dance*

Hehe, hyper me. To a certain tiger (u-know-who), luv you!

Taken from Vee’s blog.

1) Single, Taken, or Crushing?
- Single yet unavailable. Not even looking at anyone else.

2) Are you happy with that?
- I better be!

3) Would you still kiss your ex?
- NO…K will probably kill me and the ex

4) Have you ever had your heart broken?
- yes, twice. Once last year

5) Do you believe that there are certain circumstances where cheating is ok?
- no, I’ve been cheated on and been the one doing the cheating. No good comes from it.

7) Have you ever talked about marriage with another person?
- yup; hopefully by sept 2008 as we’ve (our parents) planned

8) Do you want kids?
- yes i do. According to the other half, by end of this year. NO WAY!

9)How Many?
- Always wanted 4, doesn’t matter boy or girl.

10) Would you consider adoption?
- yes, if we can’t have our own

11) If someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you?
- Yes, but keep in mind..my K would probably hate that person.

12) Do you want someone you can't have?
- No. I have my someone already.

13) Have you fallen in love?
- Yes, this time its for real.

14) Do you believe in celebrating anniversaries...?
- Yes. But everyday should be celebrated

15) Do you believe that you can change for someone?
- I think I have changed in some ways

16) Is it a good day?
- Not really

17) Have you ever broken a heart before?
- I don’t know. Maybe

18) Does your ex still have feelings for you?
- You don’t even want to know.

20) Do you believe in long distance relationship?
- Is Rawang and Pulau Indah considered long distance????

21) Do you think some of your friends will repost this?
- Unlike me, my friends are busy.

Happy 2008!

I’ve been stressing about all of things lately. No one seems to bother about my impending engagement day. Only my darling brother keeps asking *over and over AGAIN*

Brother : Bila nak kau nak tunang uh? (Translation : When you getting engaged?)

Me : 16 March nanti (no need translation – self-explanatory)

Brother : Kahwin bila? (The wedding day?)

Me : Bila K ada cukup duit! (When K saved up enough money)

And what do you know, my brother ask me the same questions AGAIN this morning and last night!

STRESS! With money woes, planning the day and so much more.

On a lighter note, I’m addicted to playing Pokemon on nephew’s gameboy. Yes K, I know how old I am. Being the cheeky aunt that I am, I named the characters with my nephews/niece’s name.

Today is a busy day at the office for me. 2008’s school term is opened. So tired right now.